Goodbyes

Good­byes are never easy espe­cially to very very close friends. Since it was decided, all the friends have been plan­ning every­thing keep­ing his farewell in mind. And now that he is actu­ally gone, the void has emerged — not only in the seats around din­ner table but in our thoughts. The feel­ing has not even sunk in yet and next few days will evoke the small mem­o­ries more promi­nently as the dust of the excite­ment will set­tle down.

I remem­ber some­one once say­ing: NRIs kahin ke bhi nahi rehte, na des ke na baa­har ke. And to think it right at this moment, its cru­elly apt. Hav­ing spent some very impor­tant years of one’s life out­side the home and away from fam­ily, this place is not a strange-land any­more. To have adapted to and breathed in this air, the aroma of the cul­ture here has blended in our per­spec­tive. But at the same time, I remem­ber how I, U and N were once stand­ing at 8th floor in my office build­ing, watch­ing the NY down­town from the cafe­te­ria. N had just come back from his home in Brazil and was talk­ing to us about it. He said, “I would love to go back.” Then he stared at the sky­line and said, “This is beau­ti­ful and I have enjoyed my 2 years here, but this is not home”. I knew what he meant. I will never for­get it because that state­ment res­onated with my inner thoughts. We smiled and went back to our desks. He is in Chicago and I am here. And I love this place. And, when­ever I go back, some part of me would stay behind. Its a choice that one has to make at some point in his life. Its a choice that S made and I am happy for him. All I know is that at this very moment, we all miss him for I have no rel­a­tives here but friends. To lose one is a very dear loss. How­ever, its not entirely a loss, I will see him very soon and till then, let me miss him.

img cour­tesy: flickr

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